Uncle Charlie, Handsome Fella

I   R E M E M B E R he taught all the kids to say "Uncle Charlie, Handsome Fella." We’d recite it when he’d walk in out of the blue on a Sunday just when we were about to eat. We always ate at 1:00 on Sunday. He’d come in. We’d add another leaf to the oak table. We’d laugh. He always had a story.

Sun Ray Homes
Frostproof, Florida

The doorbell rings. My mother goes to the door. Uncle Charlie appears.

Charlie: Well, well, here I am just dropping in on you like this. I said to myself—Charlie, you’d better check in on your sister.

Mother: Your older sister, don’t you forget.

Charlie (laughs): Mind if I sit down? Can I sit here? Were you sitting here?

Mother: No, no. Sit down.

Charlie (taking off a gold plaid sport jacket): Where shall I put my jacket? Right here, ok? (He doesn’t wait. He puts his jacket on a dining chair and sits down in my father’s LA-Z BOY and talks non-stop.) I’ll tell you, I had quite a ride last night. That car stopped me four times. (He signals my mother to look out the picture window. She pulls the sheers aside and sees a shiny red Corvette sports car.) I had to get out and go under the hood. What a night. And I felt every bump, every one. I’m not made for a car like that.

Charles the Father sits down on the ladder back chair: Yeah-yeah.

Charlie (to Charles): Well, well, and don’t you look good, Charles, I’ll tell you.

Charles the Father: Yeah-yeah. Those little cars are no good. No room for your feet. Can’t stand’em.

Charlie (smiles): It’s a cute toy, though. I bought it from a woman friend of mine in Florida. Her husband died and left this car. "His toy" she called it. And I started driving it when I’d come down. And before I knew it, I put $800 into it, you know.

Charles the Father: Yeah-yeah.

Charlie: And so I said, hell, I might as well own it, so I gave her a couple of thousand for it and now whenever I come down, I have a car down here, see. It’s a cute toy. I’ve got a big Oldsmobile back up North. A big car. I leave it up there. I’m down here more now. In fact, I’m renting a place, yep, one unit in a triplex. Rented it for a year. So I have a home down here. I thought I’d try that. Putting in a TV this week. And draperies. Can you imagine me Charlie putting up draperies? I never thought about decorating a home. Marjorie always did that. Yes. (He drifts.) I never thought about home decoration. (Snaps back.) Some women from the AA are helping me out. One gave me a rattan set—a couch and chair—just like new. She was redecorating. Yeah, I figure, why not. A guy came down last week. I had him bring my microwave and a few other things in his van, you know.

Charles the Father: Yeah-yeah.

Charlie: I help out a lot of people, AA people. I do what I can. (He fiddles with his light blue cap.) I’ll tell you, do you realize I haven’t had a drink in years. Years & years now. I’m looking pretty good, huh? People say I don’t look my age. I’m doing pretty good. Last night this woman put me up. People have been saying for years we should meet each other. So I was driving along and I thought why not, you know—

Charles the Father: Yeah-yeah.

Charlie: And I called her and took her out to dinner. A nice dinner. Very nice. And I was leaving to go to a motel and do you know she insisted on putting me up. Can you imagine that? She’s about 60. Lives with a friend in a trailer. Nice. I guess you call it a mobile home. Only permanent, you know.

Charles the Father: Yeah-yeah.

Charlie (as if not hearing): I was in bad shape after Marjorie died, I’ll tell you. Do you know she never threatened to leave me. Ever. I felt so bad after she died. I wasn’t drinking and look, look at me now. I’ve got money. Yeah, I’m your rich brother. She would have enjoyed this. And I say to myself—if I wasn’t drinking and chasing women, maybe she wouldn’t have smoked so much. Maybe she wouldn’t have smoked herself to death. She’d like that Oldsmobile. I went out and bought that car—fifteen thousand—and I came across the sales slip of a little house we bought once—under five thousand for that Cape Cod—I was going through all her stuff, you know, records, letters, eviction notices—

Charles the Father: Yeah-yeah.

Charlie: And I thought—I could’ve bought three of those houses. One car. But—we always had a good car. She had a little Toyota before she died. Had her oxygen tank and everything in it. I was in bad shape last fall. The kids went through most everything but there were some things—I decided it was time. I got some boxes. I found a love letter I wrote when we were going together and I said, Marjorie, keep this letter because I’ll never be able to say again how I love you. I want you to keep this so you’ll know always know. And do you know, she did. The letters later were all business, how much business I did in this town and the next.